Your Team Is Giving You Feedback and You’re Missing It
Andrea and Michelle explore an uncomfortable leadership truth: your team is constantly giving you feedback, but much of it goes unnoticed. While leaders often focus on the feedback they need to deliver, they can easily miss the signals employees are sending every day through conversations, questions, body language, hesitation, and even silence.
In this episode, they discuss the many ways employees communicate concerns, frustrations, and needs without always saying them directly. From subtle comments in meetings to generalized observations, shifts in engagement, and changes in behavior, Andrea and Michelle unpack how team members often test whether it is safe to be honest before sharing what they are really thinking.
They also examine the barriers that make upward feedback difficult. Because leaders hold influence over careers, opportunities, and day-to-day experiences, employees may avoid direct conversations, soften their message, or never speak up at all. The discussion highlights why creating psychological safety is essential if leaders want to hear the information that can help them improve.
Throughout the conversation, Andrea and Michelle share practical ways leaders can become better listeners, ask for feedback more effectively, and respond without becoming defensive. They explain why curiosity matters more than justification and how a leader's reaction often determines whether employees will ever speak up again.
This conversation offers practical insight into how leaders can recognize the feedback their teams are already providing, create an environment where honest conversations feel safe, and use those insights to strengthen trust, communication, and performance. If you have ever wondered what your team is trying to tell you, this episode will help you uncover the messages that may be hiding in plain sight.
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Your Team Is Giving You Feedback and You’re Missing It
Most leaders think about employee feedback as something formal, such as performance reviews, surveys, or scheduled conversations. But in reality, feedback is happening constantly through body language, hesitation, silence, frustration, and small comments made throughout the workday. The challenge is not whether employees are communicating. The challenge is whether leaders are paying attention to the messages being sent.
At Revela, we believe leadership improves when leaders learn to recognize the feedback their teams are already giving them through everyday team communication. On this episode of The Leadership Hustle, Andrea Fredrickson and Michelle Hill discussed why employees hesitate to speak directly, how psychological safety at work affects communication, and why leadership blind spots often develop because managers misread or dismiss the feedback happening around them every day.
Employee Feedback Often Shows Up Indirectly
One of the biggest misconceptions about employee feedback is that it will always be direct and obvious. In reality, many employees communicate concerns carefully, indirectly, or cautiously because leadership roles naturally create power dynamics.
Hill explained that employees are often “Testing the waters. Is it safe to be direct?” That uncertainty changes how people communicate. Instead of directly telling a manager:
“Your communication style feels harsh.”
“You interrupt people.”
“You create stress during meetings.”
Employees may:
Generalize concerns
Hint at frustrations
Use body language
Stay unusually quiet
Vent to coworkers instead of leaders
The feedback is still happening. It just is not always being delivered in a way leaders expect.
Why Leadership Roles Make Feedback Difficult
Fredrickson emphasized that leadership roles carry influence whether leaders realize it or not. Employees know managers influence:
Promotions
Opportunities
Reputation
Future growth
Because of that, even healthy workplace relationships can feel intimidating when employees need to give leadership feedback. Hill explained that many employees tolerate frustrating behaviors because they are unsure how their manager will react. Some avoid the conversation entirely. Others convince themselves the issue is not important enough to mention.
That avoidance creates leadership blind spots. Leaders often assume silence means alignment. In reality, silence may simply mean employees do not feel psychologically safe at work.
Team Communication Reveals More Than Leaders Realize
Employees communicate feedback in ways leaders frequently overlook. Fredrickson described situations where employees use body language, facial expressions, or subtle reactions during meetings to communicate disagreement or frustration. A deep sigh, crossed arms, silence, or disengagement may all signal that something feels unresolved.
Hill reinforced this point when discussing silence in meetings: “No one said anything. It must be good.” That assumption creates problems. Leaders often interpret silence as agreement when it may actually reflect:
Fear
Discomfort
Confusion
Frustration
Psychological withdrawal
Fredrickson referred to this as “false harmony.” Teams may appear aligned on the surface while concerns continue building underneath. That disconnect damages workplace trust over time.
Leadership Blind Spots Grow When Feedback Is Ignored
One of the most dangerous aspects of leadership blind spots is that leaders usually do not realize they exist. Employees often notice leadership behaviors long before leaders recognize them themselves. Hill described situations where employees privately discuss issues like delegation, communication style, or inconsistent leadership behavior but never raise them directly with the manager. For example:
A manager may believe they delegate effectively
Employees may experience delegation as “task dumping”
A leader may view themselves as efficient
Employees may experience them as abrupt or dismissive
Neither perspective is necessarily malicious. The issue is misalignment. Fredrickson explained that many leadership behaviors are unintentional. Managers often do not realize how their communication style affects others until someone has the courage to point it out. Without employee feedback, those blind spots continue growing.
Psychological Safety at Work Requires Curiosity, Not Defensiveness
Employees are far more likely to provide honest employee feedback when they feel psychologically safe at work. That safety does not happen automatically. Leaders create it through how they respond when feedback becomes uncomfortable.
Hill explained that when employees finally build enough confidence to share concerns, the manager’s reaction matters enormously. If leaders become defensive, dismissive, or argumentative, employees quickly learn that honesty is risky. Over time, that weakens workplace trust and discourages future team communication.
Fredrickson emphasized that leaders should respond in only two ways when receiving feedback:
“Thank you.”
“Great, help me understand.”
That response creates openness instead of defensiveness. Leaders who immediately justify behavior, discredit concerns, or overexplain intentions often shut the conversation down before understanding the issue. Hill encouraged leaders to approach leadership feedback with curiosity by asking:
“Can you help me understand?”
“When does this happen?”
“Can you give me an example?”
The tone behind those questions matters just as much as the words themselves. If leaders sound irritated or defensive, employees notice immediately. But when leaders stay open and curious, they create the psychological safety at work necessary for honest communication and stronger workplace culture.
Employee Feedback Is Often About Stress Responses
Another important insight was how leadership behavior changes under pressure. Hill explained that employees frequently notice communication issues when managers are stressed, overwhelmed, or operating under pressure. Leaders may become:
More abrupt
Less patient
More controlling
More reactive
Employees notice those shifts quickly. But many employees hesitate to mention them because they assume:
“The manager already knows.”
“This is temporary.”
“Now is not a good time.”
The issue is that temporary behaviors often become recurring patterns. Fredrickson pointed out that leaders unintentionally build workplace culture through repeated behaviors, even when those behaviors only appear during stressful periods. Employees experience the impact regardless of the leader’s intent.
Why Leaders Must Invite Feedback Repeatedly
One-time invitations for employee feedback rarely work. Fredrickson explained that employees often respond with: “No, everything’s fine.” That response usually reflects caution, not genuine openness.
Building psychological safety at work requires repetition and consistency. Employees need repeated evidence that leaders genuinely want feedback and can handle it appropriately. This is why developmental one-on-one conversations matter so much. Fredrickson encouraged leaders to ask questions like:
“Are there things I’m doing that make your work harder?”
“Are there ways I communicate that create confusion?”
“Am I unintentionally taking over projects?”
Questions like these normalize leadership feedback. They also help reduce leadership blind spots before frustration grows into larger company culture problems.
Body Language Is Feedback Too
Nonverbal communication is feedback that leaders need to consider as well. Fredrickson described noticing employees using eye rolls, sighs, silence, or visible frustration during meetings. Those reactions may communicate disagreement even when employees never say a word.
The key is avoiding assumptions. Hill pointed out that leaders often incorrectly assume body language is directed at them when employees may actually be distracted, stressed, or thinking about something unrelated. This is where curiosity matters again. Instead of assuming intent, leaders should ask:
“I noticed a reaction there. What are your thoughts?”
“Help me understand what you’re thinking.”
“Did something I say create concern?”
That approach strengthens team communication instead of escalating tension.
Employee Feedback Is a Leadership Opportunity
Employee feedback is not criticism to avoid. It is information leaders can use to improve communication, strengthen workplace trust, and reduce leadership blind spots. Teams are constantly communicating through conversations, body language, hesitation, and silence. Leaders who learn to recognize those signals create stronger psychological safety at work and a healthier workplace culture over time.
At Revela, we believe strong team communication starts when leaders become more curious about the feedback employees are already trying to give them. To hear more conversations about leadership feedback, workplace trust, and building a healthier company culture, listen to the rest of The Leadership Hustle podcast!
About the Hosts
Andrea Fredrickson
Andrea Fredrickson is a thought leader and consultant at Revela, an organization based in Omaha, Nebraska specializing in the development of leaders, culture alignment, and business strategy for private and family businesses of all sizes. Revela is one of the region's most experienced thought challengers, helping individuals and companies find their greatness. Andrea has built an amazing team by believing that fundamentally people want to be successful and become better versions of themselves.
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Andrea has degrees in education, management, and business. She is the author of Insight Unseen; How to lead with 20/20 business vision. She helps people see things differently, self-reflect, and never stop looking for ways to improve themselves on a personal and professional level. Andrea has spent more than 30 years researching and developing methods to help people communicate and lead more effectively.
When Andrea isn’t working with clients, you’ll find her spending time with her family & friends and making memories by exploring new cities.
Michelle Hill
Michelle Hill is a master facilitator and coach at Revela, an organization specializing in the development of leaders and aligning the culture of privately held and family businesses of all sizes. Revela is one of the region's most experienced thought challengers, helping individuals and companies find their greatness.
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An ambitious leader, Michelle has the natural ability to create forward momentum to build teams and get results. She inspires others to look within themselves and to challenge the status quo. She helps create high-performing environments. Michelle brings a diverse background: operations, employee development, and sales in the steel, hospitality, and consulting industries.
Outside of work, you will see her competitive side engaged in her daughter’s sports and ISU athletics. She loves life, her four-legged companions, and captures all the moments through her camera’s lens.
TRANSCRIPT
Andrea Fredrickson: Are you paying attention to the feedback your team is already giving you? In this episode of The Leadership Hustle, we're talking about one of the most overlooked leadership skills: recognizing the messages employees are sending every day and knowing what to do with them. Hello, and welcome to The Leadership Hustle for executives whose companies are growing fast and need leaders who are ready. Welcome back. I'm Andrea Fredrickson.
Michelle Hill: And I am Michelle Hill.
Andrea Fredrickson: And today we're talking about feedback, but probably not the kind most leaders immediately think about. When leaders hear the word feedback, they often think about the conversations they need to have with employees. The coaching. The accountability. The performance discussions.
But what about the feedback coming the other direction?
The reality is that employees are constantly communicating with their leaders. Sometimes it's direct. Sometimes it's subtle. Sometimes it's hidden in a question, a hesitation, a frustrated comment, a change in behavior, or even complete silence. The challenge is that many leaders miss those messages altogether.